


Composure

by cosmicmae (orphan_account)



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Bokuaka - Freeform, Fluff, It's not that painful I swear, M/M, slight angst??, there we go
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-05
Updated: 2016-07-09
Packaged: 2018-07-21 19:07:25
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,755
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7400068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/orphan_account/pseuds/cosmicmae
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Akaashi Keiji took pride in his composure. He was an anchor for those around him, speaking little and remaining stoic through tough situations. Consistency was his defining factor. That is, until a certain boy became a fallen leaf in his still waters.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter One

Akaashi Keiji took pride in his composure. He was an anchor for those around him, speaking little and remaining stoic through tough situations. He was proud of the fact that even close friends of his could rarely distinguish his neutral expression from his worried one. He was happy to be an anchor, happy to be consistent. That’s his defining factor. That’s who he was.

To put it simply, Akaashi Keiji was calm. He reminded himself of this, running it through his head like a chant as he tried to focus on practice. _I’m calm, I’m calm, I’m calm._ He ran the chant through his mind as he aimed the perfect toss to Fukurodani’s spirited ace. _I’m calm, I’m calm, I’m calm._ As he changed out of his athletic clothes in the locker room, he ran the chant through his mind yet again. He aggressively avoided looking at _him._ He’d rather look _anywhere_ but there, as a matter of fact. _I’m calm, I’m calm, I’m calm._ He tried not to think about why he’s had to reassure himself of this lately, why his heart skips a beat when a certain silver-haired captain does so much as glance in his general direction-

“Akaashi!”

_Oh God please no I don’t know what I did to deserve this but-_

“Akaashi!” Akaashi looked up. Bokuto was leaning against the lockers, wearing a concerned expression. “I called your name four times now” he said with a frown.

“Sorry, Bokuto-san” Akaashi said. _At least my voice sounds calm,_ he thought as he strategically chose not to take notice of the fact that Bokuto was lacking a shirt, and that the locker room was deserted. Well, nearly deserted. There were still a few lingering players who were chatting by the doorway. He seized the fluttering feeling in his stomach and tried to bury it deep down inside him.

Bokuto lightly chuckled to himself, sitting next to Akaashi on the ground where he was tying his shoes. “What were you thinking about?” He poked his finger at Akaashi’s cheek in a childish manor. It took every ounce of Akaashi’s willpower to fight down the furious blush that was dangerously close to flooding his face.

“Nothing” Akaashi said as simply as he possibly could. He angled his face away from Bokuto and pretended to be really interested in the floor. Bokuto laughed again, sending a kind of giddy happiness throughout Akaashi’s body. Akaashi knew he had it bad for that childish idiot, and he knew all too well that he wasn’t doing a very good job at hiding it. _He’s straight,_ Akaashi reminded himself bitterly. He saw how girls at school would often approach Bokuto after successful volleyball matches, carrying pink confession letters. He saw how Bokuto’s face would light up when girls flirted with him. He knew all too well that his infatuation would only lead to heartbreak.

“Well,” Bokuto drew out the word with a beaming smile on his face, “I was just going to ask you if you’d maybe want to come over to play video games? You seem out of it lately, especially during practice. I took it upon myself to be a wonderful captain and challenge you to a few rounds of Mario Kart, maybe showing you my awesome skills will help!” He looked at Akaashi with a delighted expression. He seemed really pleased with himself for coming up with the idea, even though its flaws were clear to Akaashi. Akaashi fiddled with his shoelaces and took a moment to respond. He was far too preoccupied trying to fight down his blush. “I… Uh, well, I mean, you don’t have to come. It was only an offer… Also I bet you have Mario Kart skills too. I was just kind of worried I guess I don’t know…” Bokuto stumbled over his words as his delighted expression began to fall and his amber eyes seemed to dim a little.

“Bokuto-san,” Akaashi said a bit too quickly. He took a moment to regain his composure as he avoided looking at Bokuto. “It’s fine. I’ll go.” Bokuto’s face lit up again. His mood swings really perplexed Akaashi, and they took a while for him to adjust to. He danced over memories of his first year in the volleyball club, remembering the tornado of energy that he was supposed to look up to. He supposed he did look up to Bokuto, in an odd sort of way. They were polar opposites, after all.

“You’re smiling!” Bokuto exclaimed, poking at Akaashi’s cheek again. Akaashi really wished he’d stop that. Or maybe he didn’t. “Does that mean you’ll come?”

Akaashi sighed, defeated.

“Hey, hey, hey! I’ll get you back on track, you’ll see!”

Akaashi finished packing up his things and Bokuto finally put a shirt on, to Akaashi’s relief, and they were soon heading out of the gym. He had a cheerful bounce to his step and Akaashi’s silent stride fell in pace with him. Bokuto rambled on about miscellaneous topics as Akaashi appreciated being around him. He let his eyes close for a moment, taking in the cool night’s wind. He quietly listened to the rise and fall of Bokuto’s voice, how animated his flow of speech was. Akaashi was a quiet person. He was grateful for Bokuto’s ability to fill conversation. He was grateful just to listen, though he’d never tell him that. How could he? _Calm,_ Akaashi reminded himself.

Akaashi was so deep in his own world that he almost didn’t notice when Bokuto’s jubilant string of conversation trailed off. Almost. He arched an eyebrow and opened his eyes.

If he was prepared for anything, it was definitely not for seeing Bokuto looking at him this intently. Bokuto’s owlish eyes were transfixed on him, and Akaashi’s stoic expression faltered. He was glad it was dark, it made the cherry red blush dusting his sharp cheekbones less noticeable. They locked eyes for a moment. _I’m calm, I’m calm, I’m-_

Bokuto quickly turned his gaze to the sidewalk ahead of him. “So, uh, anyways… I was talking to Kuroo the other day and he said Nekoma’s getting a whole lot stronger. He’s my bro, but we’ll definitely kick his ass at nationals…” And that was it. Bokuto rattled on, singlehandedly supporting the conversation. It was almost as if nothing happened. Maybe Akaashi would’ve been able to forget about it, if it weren’t for the rosy tint left over on his face and the racing of his heart. His slender fingers grazed his face for a beat or two. It felt hot. He was undoubtedly blushing.

The rest of their walk was nothing out of the ordinary. Akaashi tried his best to ignore what happened. _It’s not like it meant anything. He was probably wondering why I had my eyes closed. Stop making mountains out of molehills._ Within minutes, they reached Bokuto’s house. Akaashi was a bundle of nerves. Bokuto unlocked the door and slipped inside, holding it open for Akaashi with an impish smile. He nearly sighed out loud when his heart skipped a beat.

Akaashi couldn’t help but wonder what was to come of the night.


	2. Chapter Two

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Things get GAYER

Akaashi has been to Bokuto’s house countless times. After frigid winter nights of making hot cocoa, he knows where the mugs are stored. Movie marathons with Kuroo and Kenma have led him to become familiar with the creaks of the closet where the blankets are stored. He could navigate Bokuto’s house in the dark when Bokuto was “too comfy” to get himself a glass of water. Despite this, he’s found himself a tense, nervous mess whenever Bokuto invited him over. As of late, he’s been so busy trying to act natural that he’s managed to achieve the exact opposite. If Bokuto, someone usually desensitized to other people’s discomfort, has noticed a change in Akaashi, then he knew he must be extremely obvious to everyone else. These thoughts ran in circles around Akaashi’s head, driving his nerves further and further off the wall.

“Hey, Akaashi, my family isn’t home because they’re visiting my grandparents for a few days.” Akaashi looked up at Bokuto. He was still taking off his shoes when Bokuto spoke, and he nearly lost his balance as he lifted his foot to remove his shoe. “Is that ok?” Bokuto asked. Akaashi noticed the way he pulled at his fingers slightly. Was he nervous? _Stop imagining things._

“It’s fine, Bokuto-san.” Akaashi wasn’t entirely sure why Bokuto felt the need to ask. He’s been over without Bokuto’s parents being home before. It’s not that big of a deal, even though Akaashi’s pounding heart said otherwise.

“Alright! Get ready to face off against the best racer Mario Kart has ever seen! Hey, hey, hey!” Bokuto whooped and bounded towards the living room where Akaashi knew Bokuto’s wii was. He followed, his light and soundless footsteps contrasting Bokuto’s loud, clumsy ones. Bokuto grabbed two wii remotes and plopped down on the couch in front of the TV, handing Akaashi one eagerly. Akaashi accepted it and sighed. Bokuto was way too excited about this. However, he couldn’t help but smile when he saw Bokuto subconsciously bouncing to the beat of the Mario Kart music as he set up the controls. Bokuto chose to race as Donkey Kong and Akaashi picked Dry Bones. The older boy laughed heartily.

“You’re picking the turtle skeleton?” He asked through his laughter.

“Yeah” Akaashi replied simply. He tried to keep a straight face, but laughed a bit himself when Bokuto snorted and laughed harder at his response.

“Ok, ok. Fine. Just pick a course.”

“You’re letting me pick the course?”

“I can beat you at _any_ of these courses! I’m the best!”

“If you say so, Bokuto-san.” Bokuto looked a little deflated at the remark, so Akaashi offered him a small smile before returning his attention to the screen. It seemed to do the trick, since he started bouncing along to the music again. Akaashi scrolled through the courses, searching for a particular course. When he selected Rainbow Road, Bokuto whined loudly.

“Akaashiiiiii, that’s brutal! Choose anything but Rainbow Road!” Akaashi looked over at Bokuto’s alarmed expression, then started the course anyway. “Akaashi!”

To Bokuto’s amazement, Akaashi glided through the impossible course with ease. Bokuto insisted on racing at 150 cc because “Akaashi, it’s go big or go home” but didn’t expect to be the one left in the dust. Akaashi didn’t fall off the road a single time, and he was far ahead. Bokuto would try to throw banana peels at his car, yelling “I’VE GOT YOU NOW, AKAASHI” but he easily swerved out of the way to avoid them. After a few minutes of yelling and shoving each other, he finished the course in first place and Bokuto in second.

“Where the hell did you learn to play like that?” Bokuto shouted. He was awestruck, his body practically buzzing with excitement. Akaashi shrugged.

“I like Mario Kart.”

A few more rounds were played, though the results were always the same: Akaashi in first and Bokuto in second. Akaashi sensed Bokuto was starting to get dejected, and a dejected Bokuto was the last thing he needed, so he decided to slow down a little when they were neck-and-neck. Bokuto’s character raced past Akaashi’s, beating him at the last moment.

“DID YOU SEE THAT AKAASHI?” Akaashi turned his head to admire the light virtually radiating off Bokuto’s smile. He admired the way Bokuto’s eyes were transfixed by the screen. He seemed to be rereading the text that said “Koutarou” next to the first place icon. “DID YOU SEE THAT? I BEAT YOU! AREN’T I THE BEST RACER YOU’VE EVER-”

Bokuto turned his head to look at Akaashi, his eyes widening and his victory cry faltering when he saw just how close their faces were. Everything seemed to stop, everything fading into the background except for the goosebumps dotting Akaashi’s skin. Akaashi swallowed, becoming too aware of each and every point their bodies made contact. While pushing and shoving each other during the game, they must’ve moved closer together without noticing. They were close enough for Akaashi to notice the speckles of gold in Bokuto’s eyes. He noticed that Bokuto’s eyelashes were the same color as the darkest strands of his hair. They say people are even prettier up close, and Bokuto was no exception. The previously lighthearted mood in the air manifested into something tense. Thoughts of closing the small gap between them and planting a kiss on Bokuto’s lips wouldn’t escape his mind, and Akaashi didn’t know what to do. _I’m calm, I’m calm, I’m calm._ For once in his life, Akaashi was visibly and certainly not calm. His heart pounded like a hammer. He was sure Bokuto could feel it even through the fabric of their pants where their thighs touched. Bokuto’s eyes fluttered down to Akaashi’s lips for a moment, causing his breath to hitch in his throat. _I’m calm, I’m-_

“I’m going to get popcorn” Bokuto said a bit too loudly, abruptly getting off the couch and vanishing through the doorway. The door slammed shut, silence filling the room that was previously filled with Bokuto’s laughter. A few moments passed, and when he began to hear popcorn kernels popping from the kitchen, Akaashi felt like the tension would suffocate him. He desperately tried to fight off the tears threatening to well in his eyes. He couldn’t believe himself. _Bokuto is straight. He isn’t into you. Get yourself together._ A few tears fell, despite his disapproval and frustration, making shimmering paths down his angular face and resting at his jaw. _There’s no way he doesn’t know how you feel now. Now he knows you have feelings for him,_ he thought. For the first time, his emotions took complete control of him. His mind whirled with memories of their friendship. He remembered the first time Bokuto asked him to hang out outside of practice, offering to buy him ice cream in return for more tosses. He remembered the time Bokuto forced him to stay up and watch horrible reality television shows with him. He remembered the frozen look on Bokuto’s face right before he broke eye contact. _You’ve managed to ruin everything._


	3. Chapter Three

Bokuto’s gaze bored into the microwave, burning metaphorical holes into the popcorn bag that rotated inside. His frustration increased as the microwave’s timer slowly counted down the time until he would have to face Akaashi again. A surge of panic washed through him. The thought itself made him want to throw up. _If Akaashi found out…_

He let out a rattled breath. He had far too many close calls today, beginning with how he couldn’t help but poke Akaashi’s cheek flirtatiously in the locker room. He was cute, after all. _More than cute,_ Bokuto thought to himself as scattered images of Akaashi resurfaced in his brain. He thought of how the light casted shadows on Akaashi’s high cheekbones, vibrant colors from the videogame reflected onto his blemish-free skin. He pictured how Akaashi looked on their walk back from practice. His face angled towards the wind, long eyelashes curling at the most gorgeous angle. His dark, silky hair had a soft curl to it. Bokuto was often left wondering just what it would feel like to run his hands through it, what it would feel like to trace the curvatures of his face with his fingertips. He was like some kind of humanoid art. He sighed, shaking his head. He knew almost upon meeting Akaashi that he had it bad for him. Months upon months of pining led Bokuto to understand that Akaashi had him wrapped around his finger.

His attention flitted to his phone that sat heavily in his pocket. Unlocking it, his eyes swept over a few unread messages from Kuroo.

 

**Kuroo 8:03 pm:** Bro idc that Akaashi’s getting better at setting

**Kuroo 8:03 pm:** Kenma can kick his ass any day

**Kuroo 8:19 pm:** Bro I have the best idea let’s make them DUEL

 

He laughed a little to himself. Kuroo may be an idiot but he’s always been good at putting a smile on Bokuto’s face at the right moment.

 

**Bokuto 9:48 pm:** Bro I have a dilemma

**Bokuto 9:48 pm:** It has to do with you-know-who

**Kuroo 9:49 pm:** OH MAN UR SO WHIPPED

**Kuroo 9:49 pm:** Whats the prob tho

**Bokuto 9:49 pm:** He’s been acting weird so I invited him over for mario kart

**Bokuto 9:49 pm:** Everyone loves mario it’s a classic

**Kuroo 9:49 pm:** Tru

 

Bokuto shook his hands out, as if it would rid him of his nerves. He took a deep breath and prepared to explain everything to Kuroo.

 

**Bokuto 9:50 pm:** So we got into the game and we were pushing each other and I guess we got too close without realizing it and I looked at him and our faces were so close??? Like SO CLOSE and I’ve never wanted to kiss someone so bad and oh my god Kuroo he’s just SO PRETTY and I was dumb and I looked at his lips for like one second and he TOTALLY SAW ME AND I WAS JUST SO NERVOUS THAT I LEFT I DIDN’T KNOW WHAT TO DO MAN I SAID IT WAS TO MAKE POPCORN BUT I DON’T EVEN WANT POPCORN THIS FUCKING SUCKS

 

As he pressed the button to send the message, the microwave timer ringed. The high-pitched noise reverberated loudly, the sound bouncing off the walls. Bokuto was sure Akaashi could hear it from where he left him in the living room. He realized something, and was suddenly hit with a wave of gratitude. _At least I didn’t decide to call Kuroo,_ he thought. Sound travelled easily throughout Bokuto’s home, making eavesdropping a simple task for anyone, especially someone as intelligent as Akaashi. If he called Kuroo, Akaashi would have heard every word. _That would’ve added to the list of things I fucked up tonight._ He fought off surges of regret as he opened the cabinet to retrieve a bowl for the popcorn. His phone buzzed.

 

**Kuroo 9:52 pm:** OMG

**Bokuto 9:52 pm:** IKR I FUCKED UP

**Kuroo 9:54 pm:** Maybe u didn’t tho

 

Bokuto stared at the latter message. What did Kuroo mean? Of course he fucked up, you’re not supposed to want to kiss your friend. He didn’t have much time to wonder, however, because his phone buzzed with another message.

 

**Kuroo 9:54 pm:** How did he react

 

Bokuto pondered this for a moment, filling the bowl with popcorn. When the last pieces tumbled out of the bag and into the brimming bowl, he thought back to Akaashi’s startled expression. He remembered every muscle in Akaashi visibly tensing up, his eyes as wide as saucers, then the look in his eyes shattering as Bokuto began to leave…

 

**Bokuto 9:56 pm:** Idk

**Kuroo 10:02 pm:** It’s been awhile so I think u should go back in there

**Kuroo 10:02 pm:** Get laid fucker

**Kuroo 10:02 pm:** I believe in u

“It’s not even about sex,” Bokuto muttered to himself. He nervously pulled at his fingers as if he could draw the anxiety out of himself by doing so. Bokuto wasn’t entirely sure he understood what Kuroo meant. He didn’t really know how to go about things when he faced Akaashi again. Should he apologize? Should he pretend nothing happened? He stared at the clock, drumming his fingers on the counter where the bowl of popcorn sat. Maybe it was cruel, but part of him wanted to keep Akaashi waiting. Part of him wanted to never face what happened. However, a stronger part of him urged him to pick up the popcorn and slip his phone back into his pocket. He ran a hand through his styled hair, closing his eyes for a moment to regain any sense of confidence he could muster, and began making his way towards the living room.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY FOR THE LAST CHAPTER ENDING ON SUCH A SAD NOTE! I didn't want this fic to turn out sad but lmao it happened anyway. I PROMISE it won't get too sad in the future. This chapter is primarily to lighten the mood, so it's extremely short (I'm sorry). I also added in some Kuroo so I hope I'm forgiven. Thank you for reading!


	4. Chapter Four

Akaashi took a deep breath. The sound of popping kernels was long gone, which meant Bokuto would be coming back any minute now. He frantically wiped his face free of fallen tears, hoping to any god there ever was that he didn’t look like he’d been crying. Rubbing his temples, he began to wonder what got into him. He was always calm and in control of his emotions, yet he’d just broken down into tears. He wasn’t sure what to do or how to act, his mind mulling over the situation on repeat as he dried his tear-stained fingertips on his pants. _It’s not a big deal,_ he told himself. _Please calm down._ His pulse slowed to a normal rate and his hands finally stopped shaking.

“Popcorn!” He heard Bokuto say from the doorway. His pulse instantly sped up again. _Damn it._ Bokuto stood slightly awkwardly as if he was unsure of whether to come in or not, even though he was in his own home. The tension in the room was nearly thick enough to be tangible.

Bokuto crossed the room and sat next to Akaashi on the couch, leaving a significant amount of space between them. He noticed Akaashi staring at the space, so he placed the popcorn on the miles of couch between them. Akaashi sighed quietly to himself, his eyes stinging slightly. _I fucked up, I fucked up, I-_

“I… uh…” Bokuto trailed off in an uncharacteristically quiet tone, causing Akaashi to freeze. “I’m sorry.” Akaashi was caught off guard. He began to wonder what Bokuto meant before he realized it must be his way of rejecting him.

“It’s fine, Bokuto-san.” His voice was hoarse and his eyes unwillingly filled with tears again. He didn’t even bother trying to calm himself down because he knew his efforts were futile. He wasn’t calm, he wasn’t sure if he would be calm ever again after being rejected like this. He got up off the couch and walked towards the door to leave the living room. His hand was on the cool metal of the doorknob, moments away from turning it, when Bokuto’s voice stopped him in his tracks.

            “I didn’t mean to make you cry.” Bokuto whispered this, almost under his breath, and Akaashi wasn’t sure if he was meant to hear it. His voice sounded broken, as if he was the one who should be upset.

            “Rejection does that to a person.” He said dryly, instantly regretting the venom tinging his words as they slipped out of his mouth. He turned the doorknob and closed the door gingerly behind him only to have it flung open a few moments later.

            “Akaashi!” He heard Bokuto shout from behind him. It took every last, straining bit of strength in him to hold himself back from continuing the conversation. He wanted so badly to know what Bokuto had to say. He wanted to know what was so important that it couldn’t possibly wait another moment, important enough to cause Bokuto to fling open the door in protest of his departure, but he couldn’t bring himself to sink to a level low enough to do so. He had to seize the final remaining ribbons of his dignity and leave before the salt pooling his eyes finally tumbled down his face. He was keeping his pace down the hallway and to the area by the door where he left his shoes, taking long strides that he hoped appeared as even as he prayed they were, when a firm hand on his shoulder held him back.

            “I just…” Bokuto’s speech trailed off yet again, making Akaashi sigh in frustration. He wasn’t sure what it was that Bokuto didn’t understand about the situation, but he was still too lost in his own fear to pour everything out on the table and spell it out for him like a game of scrabble. The grip on his shoulder slackened as Akaashi responded without turning around.

            “You understand enough, Bokuto-san.”

            “I’m sorry.” Bokuto’s voice wobbled with every syllable, similar to a child taking their first hesitant steps on two feet. Like a child learning to walk, Bokuto didn’t know where to go or what to do with what he was doing. He spoke entirely on emotion and lack of concern for his inhibitions. “I’m sorry for almost kissing you and I’m sorry for having feelings for you.” Bokuto felt as if a minor weight was lifted off his shoulders as a larger, more threatening weight was dropped upon him simultaneously. The same sort of tangible intensity from before settled into the room, pressing its palms down on their heads. Bokuto had a strong feeling that would be the only complete sentence he would speak in the entire evening. _If he stays for any longer,_ he added bitterly to himself, noting the way every fiber of Akaashi’s being seemed to be gravitating towards grabbing his shoes and leaving.

            “You’re straight.” Akaashi said, his usual smooth tone adopting a wobble of its own.

            Bokuto snorted, then a tiny giggle escaped his lips. It quickly evolved into rich laughter that shook his shoulders and brought tears to his crinkled eyes, this time for all the right reasons. He planted his hands on his hips and threw his head back in his hilarity. Akaashi held a plain face.

            “Bokuto-san,” Akaashi began, but Bokuto cut him off with his familiarly loud laughter. He wiped at his eyes and seemed to get himself under control, much to Akaashi’s relief. He waited for Bokuto to fully settle down, then he went on. “I don’t get what’s so funny, and if you’re just going to laugh at me then-”

            “Akaashi!” Bokuto meant to say his name teasingly, but his voice was far too drenched in affection for his plan to follow through. He wasn’t sure what it was, but something about seeing Akaashi so worked up over something that wasn’t true was endearing in an odd sort of way. He drew in a breath, his tone swinging to deliberation before he even finished taking a breath. “I meant it.” He fidgeted with the hem of his shirt and pulled his fingers nervously, avoiding Akaashi’s steady eye contact. He figured he owed Akaashi an explanation before he left even if it meant months of awkward interaction at practice, especially in the locker room.

            What he was yet to understand is that Akaashi felt the same way. For weeks upon weeks he tore himself up over his feelings for his teammate, scolding himself for getting distracted at practices that grew longer and longer as his feelings blossomed. It was pointless, as far as Akaashi was previously concerned. Weeks upon weeks of telling himself to calm down, to get himself under control did nothing but turn him further into a nervous wreck. His nerves accumulated, leading him to Bokuto’s house where he now stood in a snowball effect. However, after so many nights of wondering just how things would turn out between them, so many nights lying awake asking himself “What if?” he was left without a word to say. No matter how hard he tried, he couldn’t connect his stars into the constellations he wanted. He took a slightly shaky step towards Bokuto, looking up at him through dark eyelashes and an armor of false bravery. The taller boy looked as tense as ever, but didn’t move away. His words echoed and floated around Akaashi’s head. _I’m sorry for almost kissing you and I’m sorry for having feelings for you._ Akaashi smiled. His heartbeat surged through his entire body as he lifted himself up to meet Bokuto’s height, planting a shy kiss on his lips. _There’s no reason to apologize, Bokuto-san,_ he thought knowingly to himself as he felt Bokuto’s muscles ease and his arms hesitantly snake around Akaashi’s waist.

Bokuto kissed back, marveling to himself when he noticed Akaashi’s lips were as soft as flower petals. Akaashi’s hands traced up his arms and laid to rest at his muscular shoulders. Their mouths moved together in a messy, far from synchronized manner, and their teeth occasionally clinked together. Bokuto bit down a bit too hard on Akaashi’s lip, which he immediately apologized for while turning a shade of pink to match Akaashi’s ears. It certainly wasn’t anything near perfect nor graceful. There weren’t any fireworks, nor were there any singing doves nor ringing bells like in fairytales. There was only Akaashi and Bokuto, and the realization that sometimes it’s alright to lose your composure. _I’m not calm, I’m not calm, I’m not calm._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!! So, this is the last chapter! Thank you so much for reading and feel free to follow me on my twitter if you haven't already ( @cosmicbokuto ). I'm pretty proud of how it turned out, considering it's my first fic I've ever written. I've had such a nice experience with writing this fic that I plan to write a lot more in the future. Thank you again for reading and supporting it!!

**Author's Note:**

> Hi! This is my first fic I've ever written, so I apologize for any mistakes that may be here and there. It's going to be fairly short, with an average amount of chapters. Thank you so much for reading and I hope you enjoy it!


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